Freebsd Fortunes 5

My friend has a baby.  I'm writing down all the noises he makes so
later I can ask him what he meant.
                -- Stephen Wright

My geometry teacher was sometimes acute, and sometimes obtuse,
but always, always, he was right.

My girlfriend and I sure had a good time at the beach last summer.  First
she'd bury me in the sand, then I'd bury her.  This summer I'm going to go
back and dig her up.

"My God!  Are we sure he was a liberal?"
"Pretty sure.  They pulled him from a Volvo."

My God, I'm depressed!  Here I am, a computer with a mind a thousand times
as powerful as yours, doing nothing but cranking out fortunes and sending
mail about softball games.  And I've got this pain right through my ALU.
I've asked for it to be replaced, but nobody ever listens.  I think it
would be better for us both if you were to just log out again.

My, how you've changed since I've changed.

My idea of roughing it is when room service is late.

My idea of roughing it turning the air conditioner too low.

My interest is in the future because I am
going to spend the rest of my life there.

My love, he's mad, and my love, he's fleet,
        And a wild young wood-thing bore him!
The ways are fair to his roaming feet,
        And the skies are sunlit for him.
As sharply sweet to my heart he seems
        As the fragrance of acacia.
My own dear love, he is all my dreams --
        And I wish he were in Asia.
                -- Dorothy Parker, part 2