Humor: Best of Fortunes for Friday October 21, 2016

FreeBSD: everything but the fairings
FreeBSD: everything but the fairings

A group of soldiers being prepared for a practice landing on...
A group of soldiers being prepared for a practice landing on a tropical island were warned of the one danger the island held, a poisonous snake that could be readily identified by its alternating orange and black bands. They were instructed, should they...

There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in...
There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in a bucket. His daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man, And as for the bucket, Nantucket. The pair of them went to Manhasset, (Nan and the man with the asset.)...

There was a young man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long...
There was a young man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, While wiping his chin, "If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it."

You never know who's right, but you always know who's in charge.
You never know who's right, but you always know who's in charge.

When you meet a master swordsman, show him your sword. When...
When you meet a master swordsman, show him your sword. When you meet a man who is not a poet, do not show him your poem. -- Rinzai, ninth century Zen master