Humor: Best of Fortunes for Tuesday April 18, 2017

A widow whose singular vice Was to keep her late husband...
A widow whose singular vice Was to keep her late husband on ice Said, "It's been hard since I lost him -- I'll never defrost him! Cold comfort, but cheap at the price."

A wonderful bird is the pelican. His mouth can hold more than...
A wonderful bird is the pelican. His mouth can hold more than his belican. He can take in his beak Enough food for a week. And I'm darned if I know how the helican.