Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Friday September 3, 2021

There once was a fellow named Sweeney Who spilled gin all over...
There once was a fellow named Sweeney Who spilled gin all over his weenie. Not being uncouth, He added vermouth And slipped his amour a martini.

There was a young lady of Twickenham Who thought men had...
There was a young lady of Twickenham Who thought men had not enough prick in 'em. On her knees every day To God she would pray To lengthen and strengthen and thicken 'em.

You are not drunk if you can lay on the floor without holding...
You are not drunk if you can lay on the floor without holding on.

Q: What do you say to a New Yorker with a job? A:...
Q: What do you say to a New Yorker with a job? A: Big Mac, fries and a Coke, please!