Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of October, 2024

There was a young man of high station Who was found by a pious...
There was a young man of high station Who was found by a pious relation Making love in a ditch To -- I won't say a bitch -- But a woman of no reputation.

Jesus Saves, Moses Invests, But only Buddha pays Dividends.
Jesus Saves, Moses Invests, But only Buddha pays Dividends.

A bad little girl in Madrid, A most reprehensible kid, ...
A bad little girl in Madrid, A most reprehensible kid, Told her Tante Louise That her cunt smelled like cheese, And the worst of it was that it did!

A petulant man once said, "Pish, Your cunt is as big as...
A petulant man once said, "Pish, Your cunt is as big as a dish." She replied, "Why, you fool, With your limp little tool, It's like driving a pin with a fish."

A plumber whose name was John Brink Plumbed the cook as...
A plumber whose name was John Brink Plumbed the cook as she bent o'er the sink. Her resistance was stout, And John Brink petered out, With his pipe-wrench all limber and pink.

There once was a clergyman's daughter Who detested the pony...
There once was a clergyman's daughter Who detested the pony he bought her, Till she found that its dong Was as hard and as long As the prayers her father had taught her. She married a fellow named Tony Who soon found her fucking...

There once was a maid from Mobile Whose cunt was made of blue...
There once was a maid from Mobile Whose cunt was made of blue steel. She only got thrills From pneumatic drills And an off-centered emery wheel.

There once was a man from Dunoon, Who always ate soup with...
There once was a man from Dunoon, Who always ate soup with a fork. He said "When I eat Either fish, foul or flesh, I otherwise finish too quick."

There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled some raw gin...
There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled some raw gin on his weeny. Just to be couth, He added vermouth, And slipped his girlfriend a martini.

There once was a young man from France Who waited ten years...
There once was a young man from France Who waited ten years for his chance; Then he muffed it...