Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of November, 2024

A man may be so much of everything that he is nothing...
A man may be so much of everything that he is nothing of anything. -- Samuel Johnson

From deep in the crypt at St. Giles Came a bellow that echoed...
From deep in the crypt at St. Giles Came a bellow that echoed for miles. Said the rector, "My gracious, Has Father Ignatius Forgotten the Bishop has piles!?"

There once was a young man from Boston Who drove around town...
There once was a young man from Boston Who drove around town in an Austin, There was room for his ass, And a gallon of gas, So he hung out his balls and he lost 'em.

There was a young lady from Drew Who ended her verse at line...
There was a young lady from Drew Who ended her verse at line two.

There was a young lady named Hatch Who would always come...
There was a young lady named Hatch Who would always come through in a scratch. If a guy wouldn't neck her, She'd grab up his pecker And shove the damn thing up her snatch.

There was a young lady named Mable Who liked to sprawl out...
There was a young lady named Mable Who liked to sprawl out on the table, Then cry to her man, "Stuff in all you can -- Get your ballocks in, too, if you're able."

There was a young man from Kent Whose tool was so long that...
There was a young man from Kent Whose tool was so long that it bent. To save himself trouble He put it in double And instead of coming, he went.

There was a young man from Rangoon Who used to lament 'neath...
There was a young man from Rangoon Who used to lament 'neath the moon That he had the luck To be born of a fuck That was scraped off the sheets with a spoon.

There was an old pirate named Bates Who was learning to rhumba...
There was an old pirate named Bates Who was learning to rhumba on skates He fell on his cutlass Which rendered him nutless And practically useless on dates.

Q: What do they call the alphabet in Arkansas? A:...
Q: What do they call the alphabet in Arkansas? A: The impossible dream.