Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of June, 2024

There once was a lady named Clair, Who posessed a magnificent...
There once was a lady named Clair, Who posessed a magnificent pair. Or that's what I thought, Till I saw one get caught, On a thorn and begin losing air.

There was a young fellow from Leeds Who swallowed a package...
There was a young fellow from Leeds Who swallowed a package of seeds. Great tufts of grass Sprouted out of his ass And his balls were all covered with weeds.

There was a young lady of Kent, Who admitted she knew what...
There was a young lady of Kent, Who admitted she knew what it meant When men asked her to dine, And plied her with wine, She knew, oh she knew -- but she went!

The Least Successful Animal Rescue The firemen's strike...
The Least Successful Animal Rescue The firemen's strike of 1978 made possible one of the great animal rescue attempts of all time. Valiantly, the British Army had taken over emergency firefighting and on 14 January they were called out by...

Today is National Existential Ennui Awareness Day.
Today is National Existential Ennui Awareness Day.

A charmer from old Amarillo, Sick of finding strange heads...
A charmer from old Amarillo, Sick of finding strange heads on her pillow, Decided one day That to keep men away She would stuff up her crevice with Brillo.

A greedy young lady from Sidney Liked it in up to her kidney, ...
A greedy young lady from Sidney Liked it in up to her kidney, Till a man from Quebec Shoved it up to her neck-- He really diddled her, didn' he?

A habit depraved and unsavory Held the bishop of Bingham...
A habit depraved and unsavory Held the bishop of Bingham in slavery Midst screeches and howls He deflowered young owls Which he kept in an underground aviary

A hidebound young virgin named Carrie Would say, when...
A hidebound young virgin named Carrie Would say, when the fellows got hairy : "Keep your prick in your pants Till the end of this dance--" Which is why Carrie still has her cherry.

A limerick packs laughs anatomical Into space that is quite...
A limerick packs laughs anatomical Into space that is quite economical. But the good ones I've seen So seldom are clean, And the clean ones so seldom are comical.