|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1721 of 2182|
FORTUNE'S FUN FACTS TO KNOW AND TELL: #19
A Los Angeles judge ruled that "a citizen may snore with immunity in
his own home, even though he may be in possession of unusual and exceptional
ability in that particular field."
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1722 of 2182|
FORTUNE'S FUN FACTS TO KNOW AND TELL: #1
In Blythe, California, a city ordinance declares that a person must own
at least two cows before he can wear cowboy boots in public.
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1723 of 2182|
FORTUNE'S FUN FACTS TO KNOW AND TELL: #2
Horses are forbidden to eat fire hydrants in Marshalltown, Iowa.
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1724 of 2182|
FORTUNE'S FUN FACTS TO KNOW AND TELL: #3
A New York City judge ruled that if two women behind you at the
movies insist on discussing the probable outcome of the film, you have the
right to turn around and blow a Bronx cheer at them.
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1725 of 2182|
FORTUNE'S FUN FACTS TO KNOW AND TELL: #8
Idaho state law makes it illegal for a man to give his sweetheart
a box of candy weighing less than fifty pounds.
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1726 of 2182|
Fortune's Great Moments in History: #3
August 27, 1949:
A Hall of Fame opened to honor outstanding members of the
Women's Air Corp. It was a WAC's Museum.
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1727 of 2182|
FORTUNE'S GUIDE TO DEALING WITH REAL-LIFE SCIENCE FICTION: #14
What to do...
if reality disappears?
Hope this one doesn't happen to you. There isn't much that you
can do about it. It will probably be quite unpleasant.
if you meet an older version of yourself who has invented a time
traveling machine, and has come from the future to meet you?
Play this one by the book. Ask about the stock market and cash in.
Don't forget to invent a time traveling machine and visit your
younger self before you die, or you will create a paradox. If you
expect this to be tricky, make sure to ask for the principles
behind time travel, and possibly schematics. Never, NEVER, ask
when you'll die, or if you'll marry your current SO.
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1728 of 2182|
FORTUNE'S GUIDE TO DEALING WITH REAL-LIFE SCIENCE FICTION: #2
What to do...
if you get a phone call from Mars:
Speak slowly and be sure to enunciate your words properly. Limit
your vocabulary to simple words. Try to determine if you are
speaking to someone in a leadership capacity, or an ordinary citizen.
if he, she or it doesn't speak English?
Hang up. There's no sense in trying to learn Martian over the phone.
If your Martian really had something important to say to you, he, she
or it would have taken the trouble to learn the language before
if you get a phone call from Jupiter?
Explain to your caller, politely but firmly, that being from Jupiter,
he, she or it is not "life as we know it". Try to terminate the
conversation as soon as possible. It will not profit you, and the
charges may have been reversed.
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1729 of 2182|
FORTUNE'S GUIDE TO DEALING WITH REAL-LIFE SCIENCE FICTION: #6
What to do...
if a starship, equipped with an FTL hyperdrive lands in your backyard?
First of all, do not run after your camera. You will not have any
film, and, given the state of computer animation, noone will believe
you anyway. Be polite. Remember, if they have an FTL hyperdrive,
they can probably vaporize you, should they find you to be rude.
Direct them to the White House lawn, which is where they probably
wanted to land, anyway. A good road map should help.
if you wake up in the middle of the night, and discover that your
closet contains an alternate dimension?
Don't walk in. You almost certainly will not be able to get back,
and alternate dimensions are almost never any fun. Remain calm
and go back to bed. Close the door first, so that the cat does not
wander off. Check your closet in the morning. If it still contains
an alternate dimension, nail it shut.
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1730 of 2182|
Fortune's Guide to Freshman Notetaking:
WHEN THE PROFESSOR SAYS: YOU WRITE:
Probably the greatest quality of the poetry John Milton -- born 1608
of John Milton, who was born in 1608, is the
combination of beauty and power. Few have
excelled him in the use of the English language,
or for that matter, in lucidity of verse form,
'Paradise Lost' being said to be the greatest
single poem ever written."
Current historians have come to Most of the problems that now
doubt the complete advantageousness face the United States are
of some of Roosevelt's policies... directly traceable to the
bungling and greed of President
... it is possible that we simply do Professor Mitchell is a
not understand the Russian viewpoint... communist.