Freebsd Fortunes 3

COMPLIMENT:
        When you say something to another which everyone knows isn't true.

compuberty, n:
        The uncomfortable period of emotional and hormonal changes a
        computer experiences when the operating system is upgraded and
        a sun4 is put online sharing files.

COMPUTER:
        An electronic entity which performs sequences of useful steps in a
        totally understandable, rigorously logical manner.  If you believe
        this, see me about a bridge I have for sale in Manhattan.

Computer programmers do it byte by byte.

Computer programmers never die, they just get lost in the processing.

Computer programs expand so as to fill the core available.

COMPUTER SCIENCE:
        1) A study akin to numerology and astrology, but lacking the
           precision of the former and the success of the latter.
        2) The protracted value analysis of algorithms.
        3) The costly enumeration of the obvious.
        4) The boring art of coping with a large number of trivialities.
        5) Tautology harnessed in the service of Man at the speed of light.
        6) The Post-Turing decline in formal systems theory.

Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about
telescopes.
                -- Edsger W. Dijkstra

Computer Science is the only discipline in which we view
adding a new wing to a building as being maintenance
                -- Jim Horning

Computers are not intelligent.  They only think they are.