Humor: Best of Fortunes for Tuesday December 11, 2012

A wonderful bird is the pelican. His mouth can hold more than...
A wonderful bird is the pelican. His mouth can hold more than his belican. He can take in his beak Enough food for a week. I'm darned if I know how the helican.

There once was a lifeguard named Lee Who rescued a girl from...
There once was a lifeguard named Lee Who rescued a girl from the sea She asked how to pay, And he said "Try this way, Go down for the third time on me."

There was a young fellow named Pell Who didn't like cunt very...
There was a young fellow named Pell Who didn't like cunt very well. He would finger or fuck one, But never would suck one-- He just couldn't get used to the smell.