Humor: Best of Fortunes for Sunday January 31, 2016

There once was a jolly old bloke Who picked up a girl for...
There once was a jolly old bloke Who picked up a girl for a poke. He took down her pants, Fucked her into a trance, And then shit into her shoe for a joke.

There once was a man from Calcutta Who used to beat off in...
There once was a man from Calcutta Who used to beat off in the gutta The heat of the sun Affected his gun And turned all his cream into butta!

There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in...
There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in a bucket. His daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man, And as for the bucket, Nantucket. The pair of them went to Manhasset, (Nan and the man with the asset.)...

There was a strong man of Drumrig Who one day did seven times...
There was a strong man of Drumrig Who one day did seven times frig. He buggered three sailors, Four dogs and two tailors, And ended by fucking a pig.

There was a young fellow named Case Who entered a cunt-lapping...
There was a young fellow named Case Who entered a cunt-lapping race. He licked his way clean Through Number thirteen, But then slipped and got pissed in the face.

Kirk to Enterprise -- beam down yeoman Rand and a six-pack.
Kirk to Enterprise -- beam down yeoman Rand and a six-pack.