Humor: Best of Fortunes for Wednesday March 8, 2017

Gay shlafen: Yiddish for "go to sleep"...
Gay shlafen: Yiddish for "go to sleep". Now doesn't "gay shlafen" have a softer, more soothing sound than the harsh, staccato "go to sleep"? Listen to the difference: "Go to sleep, you little...

There once was a young man from France Who waited ten years...
There once was a young man from France Who waited ten years for his chance; Then he muffed it...

You are the only person to ever get this message.
You are the only person to ever get this message.

Q: What is the difference between Jurassic Park...
Q: What is the difference between Jurassic Park and Microsoft? A: One is an over-rated high tech theme park based on prehistoric information and populated mostly by dinosaurs, the other is a Steven Spielberg movie.

Enjoy your life; be pleasant and gay, like the birds in May.
Enjoy your life; be pleasant and gay, like the birds in May.

Envy is a pain of mind that successful men cause their...
Envy is a pain of mind that successful men cause their neighbors. -- Onasander