Humor: Best of Fortunes for Friday May 1, 2020

There was a young man from Brazil, And a lady who'd not take...
There was a young man from Brazil, And a lady who'd not take the pill, They lay on the sofa, And a <$H12{ot]{ok]{ob{o[]{oR{oK{oDpo~po~pot~poe~{ o!po~po~poq~ n~po_~{o[po ...

There was a young man of Devizes Whose balls were of different...
There was a young man of Devizes Whose balls were of different sizes. His tool when at ease, Hung down to his knees, Oh, what must it be when it rises!

_ _ / \ o / \ | | ...
_ _ / \ o / \ | | o o o | | | | _ o o o o | \_| | / \ o o o \__ | | | o ...

There was a young monk in Siberia, Whose morals were very...
There was a young monk in Siberia, Whose morals were very inferior, He jumped on a nun Which he shouldn't have done, And now she's a Mother Superior.

I've always felt sorry for people that don't drink --...
I've always felt sorry for people that don't drink -- remember, when they wake up, that's as good as they're gonna feel all day!

I've always made it a solemn practice to never drink anything...
I've always made it a solemn practice to never drink anything stronger than tequila before breakfast. -- R. Nesson

I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved...
I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved. -- George Gobel

Of course power tools and alcohol don't mix. Everyone knows...
Of course power tools and alcohol don't mix. Everyone knows power tools aren't soluble in alcohol... -- Crazy Nigel