Humor: Best of Fortunes for Thursday May 28, 2020

THE STORY OF CREATION or ...
THE STORY OF CREATION or THE MYTH OF URK In the beginning there was data. The data was without form and null, and darkness was upon the face of the console; and the Spirit of IBM was moving over...

A worried young man from Stamboul Discovered red spots on...
A worried young man from Stamboul Discovered red spots on his tool. Said the doctor, a cynic, "Get out of my clinic Just wipe off the lipstick, you fool."

A young lass got married at Chester; Her mother she kissed...
A young lass got married at Chester; Her mother she kissed and she blessed her. Said she, "You're in luck -- 'E's a stunning good fuck, For I've 'ad 'im meself down in Leicester."

There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled lots of gin...
There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled lots of gin on his weeney So just to be couth He added vermouth And slipped his best girl a martini.

There was a young woman whose stammer Was atrocious, and so...
There was a young woman whose stammer Was atrocious, and so was her grammar; But they were not improved When her husband was moved To knock out her teeth with a hammer. -- Edward Gorey

The seven eyes of Ningauble the Wizard floated back to his hood...
The seven eyes of Ningauble the Wizard floated back to his hood as he reported to Fafhrd: "I have seen much, yet cannot explain all. The Gray Mouser is exactly twenty-five feet below the deepest cellar in the palace of Gilpkerio Kistomerces. Even...

Life is the childhood of our immortality. --...
Life is the childhood of our immortality. -- Goethe