Humor: Best of Fortunes for Thursday March 15, 2007

We have met the enemy, and he is us. -- Walt...
We have met the enemy, and he is us. -- Walt Kelly

I have hardly ever known a mathematician who was capable...
I have hardly ever known a mathematician who was capable of reasoning. -- Plato

There once was a floozie named Annie Whose prices were...
There once was a floozie named Annie Whose prices were cosy--but cannie: A buck for a fuck, Fifty cents for a suck, And a dime for a feel of her fanny.

There once was a gangster named Brown - the sneakiest bastard...
There once was a gangster named Brown - the sneakiest bastard in town. He was caught by G-men Shooting his semen Where the cops would slip and fall down.

There once was a girl named Louise Who cunt hair hung down...
There once was a girl named Louise Who cunt hair hung down to her knees The crabs in her twat Tied the hairs in a knot And constructed a flying trapeze

There once was a miner named Dave, Who kept a dead whore in...
There once was a miner named Dave, Who kept a dead whore in his cave. She was ugly as shit, And missing one tit, But think of the money he saves.

There once was a woman from Arden Who sucked off a man in...
There once was a woman from Arden Who sucked off a man in a garden. He said, "My dear Flo, Where does all that stuff go?" And she said, "[Swallow hard] I beg pardon?"

My My, hey hey Rock and roll is here to stay The king is gone...
My My, hey hey Rock and roll is here to stay The king is gone but he's not forgotten It's better to burn out This is the story of a Johnny Rotten Than to fade away It's better to burn out than it is to rust My my, hey hey ...

Oh, yeah, life goes on, long after the thrill of livin'...
Oh, yeah, life goes on, long after the thrill of livin' is gone. -- John Cougar, "Jack and Diane"