Humor: Best of Fortunes for Thursday August 10, 2017

A wonderful bird is the pelican. His mouth can hold more than...
A wonderful bird is the pelican. His mouth can hold more than his belican. He can take in his beak Enough food for a week. I'm darned if I know how the helican.

A wood-fetish busboy named Gable Is rapid, is thorough,...
A wood-fetish busboy named Gable Is rapid, is thorough, is able; But when everything's cleared, He gives way to the weird, As he lovingly busses each table.

There once was a handsome young seaman Who with ladies...
There once was a handsome young seaman Who with ladies was really a demon. In peace or in war, At sea or on shore, He could certainly dish out the semen.

There once was a yokel of Beaconsfield Engaged to look after...
There once was a yokel of Beaconsfield Engaged to look after the deacon's field, But he lurked in the ditches And diddled the bitches Who happened to cross that antique 'un's field.