Humor: Best of Fortunes for Thursday August 3, 2017

On a paper submitted by a physicist colleague: "This...
On a paper submitted by a physicist colleague: "This isn't right. This isn't even wrong." -- Wolfgang Pauli

Price Wang's programmer was coding software. His fingers...
Price Wang's programmer was coding software. His fingers danced upon the keyboard. The program compiled without an error message, and the program ran like a gentle wind. Excellent!" the Price exclaimed, "Your technique...

As the breeches-buoy swing towards the rocks, Its occupant...
As the breeches-buoy swing towards the rocks, Its occupant cried, "Save my socks! I could not bear the loss, For with scarlet silk floss My mama has embroidered their clocks." -- Edward Gorey

There once was a man from Madras, Whose balls were made out...
There once was a man from Madras, Whose balls were made out of brass. When they clanged together, They played "Stormy Weather", And lightning shot out of his ass.

There once was a man from Nantucket Whose dick was so long...
There once was a man from Nantucket Whose dick was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin, "If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it."

There was a young lady of Natchez Who chanced to be born with...
There was a young lady of Natchez Who chanced to be born with two snatches, And she often said, "Shit! Why, I'd give either tit For a man with equipment that matches." There was a young fellow named Locke Who was born with...

Psychoanalysis?? I thought this was a nude rap session!!!
Psychoanalysis?? I thought this was a nude rap session!!!