Humor: Best of Fortunes for Saturday August 26, 2017

Alexander Graham Bell is alive and well in New York, and still...
Alexander Graham Bell is alive and well in New York, and still waiting for a dial tone.

Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

For a man to truly understand rejection, he must first...
For a man to truly understand rejection, he must first be ignored by a cat.

THE STORY OF CREATION or ...
THE STORY OF CREATION or THE MYTH OF URK In the beginning there was data. The data was without form and null, and darkness was upon the face of the console; and the Spirit of IBM was moving over...

There was a gay countess of Bray, And you may think it odd when...
There was a gay countess of Bray, And you may think it odd when I say, That in spite of high station, Rank and education, She always spelled cunt with a 'k'.

While Titian was mixing rose madder, His model reclined on...
While Titian was mixing rose madder, His model reclined on a ladder. Her position to Titian Suggested coition, So he leapt up the ladder and had 'er.