Humor: Best of Fortunes for Saturday October 3, 2020

"When are you BUTTHEADS gonna learn that you can't oppose...
"When are you BUTTHEADS gonna learn that you can't oppose Gestapo tactics *with* Gestapo tactics?" -- Reuben Flagg

A cabin boy on an old clipper Grew steadily flipper...
A cabin boy on an old clipper Grew steadily flipper and flipper. He plugged up his ass With fragments of glass And thus circumcised his old skipper.

A cautious young fellow named Lodge Had seatbelts installed...
A cautious young fellow named Lodge Had seatbelts installed in his Dodge. When his date was strapped in, He committed a sin, Without even leaving his grodge.

A cautious young fellow named Lodge, Had seatbelts installed...
A cautious young fellow named Lodge, Had seatbelts installed in his Dodge. With his date all strapped in He committed a sin Without even leaving the garage. -- "A Boy and His Dog"

There once was a man from Calcutta Who used to beat off in...
There once was a man from Calcutta Who used to beat off in the gutta The heat of the sun Affected his gun And turned all his cream into butta!

There was a young lady named Cager Who, as the result of...
There was a young lady named Cager Who, as the result of a wager, Consented to fart The entire oboe part Of Mozart's quartet in F major.

Your aim is high and to the right.
Your aim is high and to the right.