Humor: Best of Fortunes for Tuesday August 17, 2021

There a young man from the Coast Who had an affair with...
There a young man from the Coast Who had an affair with a ghost. At the height of orgasm Said the pallid phantasm, "I think I can feel it -- almost!"

There once was a fencer named Fisk, Whose speed was incredibly...
There once was a fencer named Fisk, Whose speed was incredibly brisk. So fast was his action, The Fitzgerald contraction, Foreshortended his foil to a disk.

There was a young lady named Gloria Who was had by Sir Gerald...
There was a young lady named Gloria Who was had by Sir Gerald Du Maurier, And then by six men, Sir Gerald again, And the band at the Waldorf-Astoria.

Feeling amorous, she looked under the sheets and cried,...
Feeling amorous, she looked under the sheets and cried, "Oh, no, it's Microsoft!"