Humor: Best of Fortunes for Wednesday August 25, 2021

Of course power tools and alcohol don't mix. Everyone knows...
Of course power tools and alcohol don't mix. Everyone knows power tools aren't soluble in alcohol... -- Crazy Nigel

A mathematician named Hall Had a hexhedronical ball, ...
A mathematician named Hall Had a hexhedronical ball, And the square of its weight Times his pecker's, plus eight, Was four-fifths of five-eighths of fuck-all.

A pansy who lived in Khartoum Took a lesbian up to his room...
A pansy who lived in Khartoum Took a lesbian up to his room. They argued all night Over who had the right To do what, with which, and to whom.

There once was a reverend at Kings Whose mind 'twas on heavenly...
There once was a reverend at Kings Whose mind 'twas on heavenly things. But his heart was on fire For a boy in the choir Whose buns were like jelly on springs.

There was a young fellow named Feeney Whose girl was a terrible...
There was a young fellow named Feeney Whose girl was a terrible meany. The hatch of her snatch Had a catch that would latch - She could only be screwed by Houdini.

You are here: *** *** ...
You are here: *** *** ********* ******* ***** *** * But you're not all there.

(1) Alexander the Great was a great general. (2) Great generals...
(1) Alexander the Great was a great general. (2) Great generals are forewarned. (3) Forewarned is forearmed. (4) Four is an even number. (5) Four is certainly an odd number of arms for a man to have. (6) The only number that is both even and odd...