Humor: Best of Fortunes for Saturday April 8, 2023

There once was a man from Nantee Who buggered an ape in...
There once was a man from Nantee Who buggered an ape in a tree. The results were most horrid All ass and no forehead Three balls and a purple goatee.

A cabin boy on an old clipper Grew steadily flipper...
A cabin boy on an old clipper Grew steadily flipper and flipper. He plugged up his ass With fragments of glass And thus circumcised his old skipper.

There was a young lady from Exeter, So pretty that men craned...
There was a young lady from Exeter, So pretty that men craned their necks at her. One was even so brave As to take out and wave The distinguishing mark of his sex at her.

There was a young lady named Grace Who would not take a prick...
There was a young lady named Grace Who would not take a prick in her "place." Though she'd kiss it and suck it, She never would fuck it-- She just couldn't relax face-to-face.

There was a young lady named Riddle Who had an untouchable...
There was a young lady named Riddle Who had an untouchable middle. She had many friends Because of her ends, Since it isn't the middle you diddle.

There was a young lady of Lee Who scrambled up into a tree, ...
There was a young lady of Lee Who scrambled up into a tree, When she got there Her arsehole was bare, And so was her C U N T.

Any member introducing a dog into the Society's premises shall...
Any member introducing a dog into the Society's premises shall be liable to a fine of one pound. Any animal leading a blind person shall be deemed to be a cat. -- Rule 46, Oxford Union Society, London

Anyone who considers protocol unimportant has never dealt with...
Anyone who considers protocol unimportant has never dealt with a cat. -- R. Heinlein