Humor: Best of Fortunes for Tuesday July 9, 2024

There once was a man with a hernia Who said to his doctor,...
There once was a man with a hernia Who said to his doctor, "Gol dern ya, When you work on my middle Be sure you don't fiddle With things that do not concern ya."

There was a young fellow named Bill, Who took an atomic pill, ...
There was a young fellow named Bill, Who took an atomic pill, His navel corroded, His asshole exploded, And they found his nuts in Brazil.

Never drink coke in a moving elevator. The elevator's motion...
Never drink coke in a moving elevator. The elevator's motion coupled with the chemicals in coke produce hallucinations. People tend to change into lizards and attack without warning, and large bats usually fly in the window. Additionally, you begin...