Humor: Best of Fortunes for Tuesday May 23, 2017

A mathematician named Hall Has a hexahedronical ball, ...
A mathematician named Hall Has a hexahedronical ball, And the cube of its weight Times his pecker's, plus eight Is his phone number -- give him a call...

There was a young lady from Spain Who got sick as she rode on...
There was a young lady from Spain Who got sick as she rode on a train; Not once, but again, And again, and again, And again, and again, and again.

There was an old man of St. Bees, Who was stung in the arm by...
There was an old man of St. Bees, Who was stung in the arm by a wasp. When asked, "Does it hurt?" He relied, "No, it doesn't. I'm so glad that it wasn't a hornet." -- W.S. Gilbert

You will be singled out for promotion in your work.
You will be singled out for promotion in your work.

Death didn't answer. He was looking at Spold in the same...
Death didn't answer. He was looking at Spold in the same way as a dog looks at a bone, only in this case things were more or less the other way around. -- Terry Pratchett, "The Colour of Magic"

There's so much plastic in this culture that vinyl leopard skin...
There's so much plastic in this culture that vinyl leopard skin is becoming an endangered synthetic. -- Lily Tomlin