Humor: Best of Fortunes for Friday May 27, 2022

A gifted young fellow from Sparta Was widely renowned as...
A gifted young fellow from Sparta Was widely renowned as a farta'. He could fart anything From "Of Thee I Sing," To Beethoven's "Moonlight Sonata."

There once was a bishop from Birmingham Who deflowered young...
There once was a bishop from Birmingham Who deflowered young girls while confirming 'em. As they knelt on the hassock He lifted his cassock And slipped his episcopal worm in 'em.

There once was a man from Racine, Who invented a screwing...
There once was a man from Racine, Who invented a screwing machine. Both concave and convex, It could please either sex, But, oh, what a bastard to clean!

There was a young girl of Spitzbergen, Whose people all thought...
There was a young girl of Spitzbergen, Whose people all thought her a virgin, Till they found her in bed With her twat very red, And the head of a kid just emergin'.

I woke up this morning and discovered that everything in...
I woke up this morning and discovered that everything in my apartment had been stolen and replaced with an exact replica. I told my roommate, "Isn't this amazing? Everything in the apartment has been stolen and replaced with an exact...

Two men looked out from the prison bars, One saw mud-- ...
Two men looked out from the prison bars, One saw mud-- The other saw stars. Now let me get this right: two prisoners are looking out the window. While one of them was looking at all the mud -- the other one got hit in the head.