Humor: Best of Fortunes for Thursday September 12, 2013

There once was a man from Racine, Who invented a screwing...
There once was a man from Racine, Who invented a screwing machine. Both concave and convex, It could please either sex, But, oh, what a bastard to clean!

This land is my land, and only my land, I've got a shotgun,...
This land is my land, and only my land, I've got a shotgun, and you ain't got one, If you don't get off, I'll blow your head off, This land is private property. -- Apologies to Woody Guthrie