Humor: Best of Fortunes for Sunday December 8, 2013

The best way to accelerate a Macintoy is at 9.8 meters...
The best way to accelerate a Macintoy is at 9.8 meters per second, squared.

There is no better way of exercising the imagination than...
There is no better way of exercising the imagination than the study of law. No poet ever interpreted nature as freely as a lawyer interprets truth. -- Jean Giraudoux, "Tiger at the Gates"

There once was a Duchess of Bruges Whose cunt was incredibly...
There once was a Duchess of Bruges Whose cunt was incredibly huge. Said the king to this dame As he thunderously came: "Mon Dieu! Apres moi, le deluge!"

There was a young girl who begat Three babies named Nat,...
There was a young girl who begat Three babies named Nat, Pat and Tat. T'was fun in the breeding But hell in the feeding When she found there's no tit for Tat.

There was an old maid from Cape Cod Who thought all good things...
There was an old maid from Cape Cod Who thought all good things came from god. But it wasn't the almighty Who lifted her nighty, It was Roger, the lodger, by god.

THE LESSER-KNOWN PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES #8: LAIDBACK This...
THE LESSER-KNOWN PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES #8: LAIDBACK This language was developed at the Marin County Center for T'ai Chi, Mellowness and Computer Programming (now defunct), as an alternative to the more intense atmosphere in nearby Silicon Valley...

The answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe,...
The answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything was released with the kind permission of the Amalgamated Union of Philosophers, Sages, Luminaries, and Other Professional Thinking Persons.