Humor: Best of Fortunes for Thursday August 29, 2024

A cabin boy on an old clipper Grew steadily flipper...
A cabin boy on an old clipper Grew steadily flipper and flipper. He plugged up his ass With fragments of glass And thus circumcised his old skipper.

A cautious young fellow named Lodge Had seatbelts installed...
A cautious young fellow named Lodge Had seatbelts installed in his Dodge. When his date was strapped in, He committed a sin, Without even leaving his grodge.

A clever young man named Eugene Invented a jack-off machine...
A clever young man named Eugene Invented a jack-off machine. On the twenty-third stroke The fuckin' thing broke And beat both his balls to a creame.

A novice was told by the Abbot: "Consider the goat and...
A novice was told by the Abbot: "Consider the goat and the rabbit. While they roll in the hay You just stay home and pray. You've got to get out of that habit."

There was a young fellow named Skinner Who took a young lady...
There was a young fellow named Skinner Who took a young lady to dinner At a quarter to nine, They sat down to dine, At twenty to ten it was in her. The dinner, not Skinner -- Skinner was in her before dinner. There was a young fellow...

There was a young fellow of Greenwich Whose balls were...
There was a young fellow of Greenwich Whose balls were all covered with spinach. He had such a tool It was wound on a spool, And he reeled it out inich by inich. But this tale has an unhappy finich, For due to the sand in the spinach ...

There was a young fellow of Harrow Whose john was the size of...
There was a young fellow of Harrow Whose john was the size of a marrow. He said to his tart, "How's this for a start? My balls are outside in a barrow."

There was a young lady named Blount Who had a rectangular...
There was a young lady named Blount Who had a rectangular cunt. She learned for diversion Posterior perversion, Since no one could fit here in front.