Humor: Best of Fortunes for Wednesday July 26, 2006

A priest advised Voltaire on his death bed to renounce...
A priest advised Voltaire on his death bed to renounce the devil. Replied Voltaire, "This is no time to make new enemies."

If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

Be both a speaker of words and a doer of deeds...
Be both a speaker of words and a doer of deeds. -- Homer

Pound for pound, the amoeba is the most vicious animal on earth.
Pound for pound, the amoeba is the most vicious animal on earth.

(1) Office employees will daily sweep the floors, dust the ...
(1) Office employees will daily sweep the floors, dust the furniture, shelves, and showcases. (2) Each day fill lamps, clean chimneys, and trim wicks. Wash the windows once a week. (3) Each clerk will bring a bucket of water and a scuttle of ...