Humor: Best of Fortunes for Thursday January 18, 2007

Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the play?
Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the play?

Ouch! That felt good! -- Karen Gordon
Ouch! That felt good! -- Karen Gordon

You are not dead yet. But watch for further reports.
You are not dead yet. But watch for further reports.

You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.

A burlesque dancer, a pip Named Virginia, could peel in a zip; ...
A burlesque dancer, a pip Named Virginia, could peel in a zip; But she read science fiction And died of constriction Attempting a Moebius strip. -- Cyril Kornbluth, "The Unfortunate Topology"

There once was a miner named Dave, Who kept a dead whore in...
There once was a miner named Dave, Who kept a dead whore in his cave. She was ugly as shit, And missing one tit, But think of the money he saves.

You never gain something but that you lose something...
You never gain something but that you lose something. -- Thoreau