Humor: Best of Fortunes for Monday January 7, 2008

Be nice to people on the way up, because you'll meet them...
Be nice to people on the way up, because you'll meet them on your way down. -- Wilson Mizner

hardware, n: The parts of a computer system that can...
hardware, n: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.

I would like to know What I was fencing in And what I...
I would like to know What I was fencing in And what I was fencing out. -- Robert Frost

I'll learn to play the Saxophone, I play just what...
I'll learn to play the Saxophone, I play just what I feel. Drink Scotch whisky all night long, And die behind the wheel. They got a name for the winners in the world, I want a name when I lose. They call Alabama the Crimson Tide, Call me Deacon Blues...

Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence...
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. -- H.L. Mencken

Things will get better despite our efforts to improve them...
Things will get better despite our efforts to improve them. -- Will Rogers

A computer scientist is someone who fixes things that aren't...
A computer scientist is someone who fixes things that aren't broken.

A language that doesn't affect the way you think about...
A language that doesn't affect the way you think about programming is not worth knowing.

If you love someone, set them free. If they don't come back,...
If you love someone, set them free. If they don't come back, then call them up when you're drunk.

There are some micro-organisms that exhibit characteristics...
There are some micro-organisms that exhibit characteristics of both plants and animals. When exposed to light they undergo photosynthesis; and when the lights go out, they turn into animals. But then again, don't we all?

There's so much to say but your eyes keep interrupting me.
There's so much to say but your eyes keep interrupting me.

Life is not for everyone.
Life is not for everyone.

Mathematics, rightly viewed, possesses not only truth...
Mathematics, rightly viewed, possesses not only truth but supreme beauty -- a beauty cold and austere, like that of a sculpture, without appeal to any part of our weaker nature, without the gorgeous trapping of painting or music, yet sublimely pure,...

Once upon a time, when I was training to be a mathematician,...
Once upon a time, when I was training to be a mathematician, a group of us bright young students taking number theory discovered the names of the smaller prime numbers. 2: The Odd Prime -- It's the only even prime, therefore is odd. QED. 3: ...

If you would know the value of money, go try to borrow some...
If you would know the value of money, go try to borrow some. -- Ben Franklin