Humor: Best of Fortunes for Wednesday January 25, 2017

Don't let your mind wander -- it's too little to be let...
Don't let your mind wander -- it's too little to be let out alone.

Don't put off for tomorrow what you can do today, because...
Don't put off for tomorrow what you can do today, because if you enjoy it today you can do it again tomorrow.

There once was a lawyer named Rex With minuscule organs...
There once was a lawyer named Rex With minuscule organs of sex. Arraigned for exposure, He maintained with composure, "De minimis non curat lex." [Trans: the law does not concern itself with small things. Ed.]

There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in...
There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in a bucket. His daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man, And as for the bucket, Nantucket. The pair of them went to Manhasset, (Nan and the man with the asset.)...

There was a gay countess of Bray, And you may think it odd when...
There was a gay countess of Bray, And you may think it odd when I say, That in spite of high station, Rank and education, She always spelled cunt with a 'k'.