Humor: Best of Fortunes for Wednesday March 6, 2024

A bobby of Nottingham Junction Whose organ had long ceased...
A bobby of Nottingham Junction Whose organ had long ceased to function Deceived his good wife For the rest of her life With the aid of his constable's truncheon.

A cabin boy on an old clipper Grew steadily flipper...
A cabin boy on an old clipper Grew steadily flipper and flipper. He plugged up his ass With fragments of glass And thus circumcised his old skipper.

A cute little twerp from Samoa Had a cock of one inch and...
A cute little twerp from Samoa Had a cock of one inch and no moa. It was good for keyholes And debutantes' peeholes But not worth a damn on a whoa.

A deep-throated virgin named Netty Was sucking a cock on...
A deep-throated virgin named Netty Was sucking a cock on the jetty. She said, "It tastes nice, Much better than rice, Though not quite as good as spaghetti."

A dulcet-voiced callgirl named Shedd, Who's cultured,...
A dulcet-voiced callgirl named Shedd, Who's cultured, well-spoken, well-bred, Had achieved some reknown For her tone going down-- There's a nice civil tongue in her head.

There once was a girl named Priscilla Whose vagina was flavored...
There once was a girl named Priscilla Whose vagina was flavored vanilla. The taste was so fine Man and beast stood in line (Including a stud armadilla).

There was a young German named Ringer Who was screwing an opera...
There was a young German named Ringer Who was screwing an opera singer. Said he with a grin, "Well, I've sure got it in!" Said she, "You mean that ain't your finger?"

There was a young gaucho named Bruno Who said, "Screwing...
There was a young gaucho named Bruno Who said, "Screwing is one thing I do know. A woman is fine, And a sheep is divine, But a llama is Numero Uno."

There was a young girl of Pawtucket Whose box was as big as...
There was a young girl of Pawtucket Whose box was as big as a bucket. Her boy-friend said, "Toots, I'll have to wear boots, For I see I must muck it, not fuck it."

There was a young lady of Twickenham Who thought men had...
There was a young lady of Twickenham Who thought men had not enough prick in 'em. On her knees every day To God she would pray To lengthen and strengthen and thicken 'em.

Paprika Measure: 2 dashes == 1smidgen...
Paprika Measure: 2 dashes == 1smidgen 2 smidgens == 1 pinch 3 pinches == 1 soupcon 2 soupcons == 2 much paprika