| Humor: Friday August 4, 2006 - Best of Fortunes |
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Dec 22, 2024 | |
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Humor: Best of Fortunes for Friday August 4, 2006Texas A&M football coach Jackie Sherrill went to the office...
Texas A&M football coach Jackie Sherrill went to the office of the Dean of Academics because he was concerned about his players' mental abilities. "My players are just too stupid for me to deal with them", he told the unbelieving dean... There was a young man from Boston Who rode around in... There was a young man from Boston Who rode around in an Austin. There was room for his ass And a gallon of gas, But his balls hung out and he lost 'em. 18th Rule of Friendship: A friend will let you hold... 18th Rule of Friendship: A friend will let you hold the ladder while he goes up on the roof to install your new aerial, which is the biggest son-of-a-bitch you ever saw. -- Esquire, May 1977 "A horrible little boy came up to me and said, `You know... "A horrible little boy came up to me and said, `You know in your book The Martian Chronicles?' I said, `Yes?' He said, `You know where you talk about Deimos rising in the East?' I said, `Yes?' He said `No.' -- So I hit him." ... "When the going gets tough, the tough... "When the going gets tough, the tough get empirical." -- Jon Carroll 1 + 1 = 3, for large values of 1. 1 + 1 = 3, for large values of 1. A conclusion is simply the place where someone got tired... A conclusion is simply the place where someone got tired of thinking. A gangster assembled an engineer, a chemist, and a physicist... A gangster assembled an engineer, a chemist, and a physicist. He explained that he was entering a horse in a race the following week and the three assembled guys had the job of assuring that the gangster's horse would win. They were to reconvene the... A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems... A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems. -- P. Erdos In the beginning there was nothing. And the Lord said... In the beginning there was nothing. And the Lord said "Let There Be Light!" And still there was nothing, but at least now you could see it. Humor: Best of Fortunes for Friday August 4, 2006
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