Humor: Best of Fortunes for Friday October 20, 2006

"I don't care who does the electing as long as I get to...
"I don't care who does the electing as long as I get to do the nominating" -- Boss Tweed

I don't care for the Sugar Smacks commercial. I don't like...
I don't care for the Sugar Smacks commercial. I don't like the idea of a frog jumping on my Breakfast. -- Lowell, Chicago Reader 10/15/82

God must have loved calories, she made so many of them.
God must have loved calories, she made so many of them.

God save us from a bad neighbor and a beginner on the fiddle.
God save us from a bad neighbor and a beginner on the fiddle.

Look before you leap. -- Samuel Butler
Look before you leap. -- Samuel Butler

Captain Penny's Law: You can fool all of the people...
Captain Penny's Law: You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you Can't Fool Mom.

Beer -- it's not just for breakfast anymore.
Beer -- it's not just for breakfast anymore.

I came to MIT to get an education for myself and a diploma...
I came to MIT to get an education for myself and a diploma for my mother.

A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens...
A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens to him. -- Brendan Francis

If you are afraid of loneliness, don't marry...
If you are afraid of loneliness, don't marry. -- Anton Chekhov

Probable-Possible, my black hen, She lays eggs in the Relative...
Probable-Possible, my black hen, She lays eggs in the Relative When. She doesn't lay eggs in the Positive Now Because she's unable to postulate How. -- Frederick Winsor

Chance is perhaps the work of God when He did not want...
Chance is perhaps the work of God when He did not want to sign. -- Anatole France