Freebsd Fortunes

In Tulsa, Oklahoma, it is against the law to open a soda bottle without
the supervision of a licensed engineer.

In West Union, Ohio, No married man can go flying without his spouse
along at any time, unless he has been married for more than 12 months.

Incumbent, n.:
        Person of liveliest interest to the outcumbents.
                -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"

Indifference will be the downfall of mankind, but who cares?

Individualists unite!

Infancy, n.:
        The period of our lives when, according to Wordsworth, "Heaven
lies about us."  The world begins lying about us pretty soon
afterward.
                -- Ambrose Bierce

Information Center, n.:
        A room staffed by professional computer people whose job it is
to tell you why you cannot have the information you require.

Ingrate, n.:
        A man who bites the hand that feeds him, and then complains of
indigestion.

Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.
                -- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Ink, n.:
        A villainous compound of tannogallate of iron, gum-arabic, and
water, chiefly used to facilitate the infection of idiocy and promote
intellectual crime.
                -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"