Freebsd Fortunes

There are three kinds of lies: Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics.
                -- Disraeli

"There are three possibilities: Pioneer's solar panel has turned away
from the sun; there's a large meteor blocking transmission; or someone
loaded Star Trek 3.2 into our video processor."

There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be
offered: entertainment, food, and affection.  It is customary to begin
a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount
of food, and the merest suggestion of affection.  As the amount of
affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately.
When the affection IS the entertainment, we no longer call it dating.
Under no circumstances can the food be omitted.
                -- Miss Manners' Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior

"There are three principal ways to lose money: wine, women, and
engineers.  While the first two are more pleasant, the third is by far
the more certain."
                -- Baron Rothschild, ca. 1800

There are three schools of magic.  One:  State a tautology, then ring
the changes on its corollaries; that's philosophy.  Two:  Record many
facts.  Try to find a pattern.  Then make a wrong guess at the next
fact; that's science.  Three:  Be aware that you live in a malevolent
Universe controlled by Murphy's Law, sometimes offset by Brewster's
Factor; that's engineering.

There are three things I always forget.  Names, faces -- the third I
can't remember.
                -- Italo Svevo

There are three ways to get something done:
        (1) Do it yourself.
        (2) Hire someone to do it for you.
        (3) Forbid your kids to do it.

There are times when truth is stranger than fiction and lunch time is
one of them.

There are two kinds of solar-heat systems: "passive" systems collect
the sunlight that hits your home, and "active" systems collect the
sunlight that hits your neighbors' homes, too.
                -- Dave Barry, "Postpetroleum Guzzler"

There are two types of people in this world, good and bad.  The good
sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more.
                -- Woody Allen