Freebsd Fortunes

When one woman was asked how long she had been going to symphony
concerts, she paused to calculate and replied, "Forty-seven years --
and I find I mind it less and less."
                -- Louise Andrews Kent

When properly administered, vacations do not diminish productivity:
for every week you're away and get nothing done, there's another when
your boss is away and you get twice as much done.
                -- Daniel B. Luten

When someone says "I want a programming language in which I need only
say what I wish done," give him a lollipop.

"When the going gets tough, the tough get empirical"
                -- Jon Carroll

When the government bureau's remedies don't match your problem, you
modify the problem, not the remedy.

When the Ngdanga tribe of West Africa hold their moon love ceremonies,
the men of the tribe bang their heads on sacred trees until they get a
nose bleed, which usually cures them of that.
                -- Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"

When the speaker and he to whom he is speaks do not understand, that is
metaphysics.
                -- Voltaire

When the Universe was not so out of whack as it is today, and all the
stars were lined up in their proper places, you could easily count them
from left to right, or top to bottom, and the larger and bluer ones
were set apart, and the smaller yellowing types pushed off to the
corners as bodies of a lower grade ...
                -- Stanislaw Lem, "Cyberiad"

When the weight of the paperwork equals the weight of the plane, the
plane will fly.
                -- Donald Douglas

When two people are under the influence of the most violent, most
insane, most delusive, and most transient of passions, they are
required to swear that they will remain in that excited, abnormal, and
exhausting condition continuously until death do them part.
                -- George Bernard Shaw