Freebsd Fortunes

If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.
                -- Paul Beatty

If all the world's economists were laid end to end, we wouldn't reach a
conclusion.
                -- William Baumol

If an S and an I and an O and a U
With an X at the end spell Su;
And an E and a Y and an E spell I,
Pray what is a speller to do?
Then, if also an S and an I and a G
And an HED spell side,
There's nothing much left for a speller to do
But to go commit siouxeyesighed.
                -- Charles Follen Adams, "An Orthographic Lament"

If anything can go wrong, it will.

If at first you don't succeed, give up, no use being a damn fool.

If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

If bankers can count, how come they have eight windows and only four
tellers?

"If dolphins are so smart, why did Flipper work for television?"

If entropy is increasing, where is it coming from?

If everybody minded their own business, the world would go
around a deal faster.
                -- The Duchess, "Through the Looking Glass"