Freebsd Fortunes

Q:  How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A:  None.  The Universe spins the bulb, and the Zen master stays out
    of the way.

Q:  What's a light-year?
A:  One-third less calories than a regular year.

Q:  Why did the tachyon cross the road?
A:  Because it was on the other side.

Q:  Why do ducks have flat feet?
A:  To stamp out forest fires.

Q:  Why do elephants have flat feet?
A:  To stamp out flaming ducks.

Q:  Why do mountain climbers rope themselves together?
A:  To prevent the sensible ones from going home.

Q: Somebody just posted that Roman Polanski directed Star Wars.  What
   should I do?

A: Post the correct answer at once!  We can't have people go on
   believing that!  Very good of you to spot this.  You'll probably be
   the only one to make the correction, so post as soon as you can.  No
   time to lose, so certainly don't wait a day, or check to see if
   somebody else has made the correction.

   And it's not good enough to send the message by mail.  Since you're
   the only one who really knows that it was Francis Coppola, you have
   to inform the whole net right away!

                -- Brad Templeton, "Emily Postnews Answers Your Questions
                   on Netiquette"

Quality Control, n.:
        The process of testing one out of every 1,000 units coming off
a production line to make sure that at least one out of 100 works.

Question:
Man Invented Alcohol,
God Invented Grass.
Who do you trust?

Quick!!  Act as if nothing has happened!

Quick, sing me the BUDAPEST NATIONAL ANTHEM!!