Freebsd Fortunes

Automobile, n.:
        A four-wheeled vehicle that runs up hills and down
pedestrians.

Avoid Quiet and Placid persons unless you are in Need of Sleep.
                -- National Lampoon, "Deteriorata"

Avoid reality at all costs.

"Avoid revolution or expect to get shot.  Mother and I will grieve, but
we will gladly buy a dinner for the National Guardsman who shot you."
                -- Dr. Paul Williamson, father of a Kent State student

Bacchus, n.:
        A convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for
getting drunk.
                -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"

Bagbiter:
        1. n.; Equipment or program that fails, usually
intermittently.  2. adj.:  Failing hardware or software.  "This
bagbiting system won't let me get out of spacewar."  Usage:  verges on
obscenity.  Grammatically separable; one may speak of "biting the
bag".  Synonyms: LOSER, LOSING, CRETINOUS, BLETCHEROUS, BARFUCIOUS,
CHOMPER, CHOMPING.

Bagdikian's Observation:
        Trying to be a first-rate reporter on the average American
newspaper is like trying to play Bach's "St. Matthew Passion" on a
ukelele.

Baker's First Law of Federal Geometry:
        A block grant is a solid mass of money surrounded on all sides
by governors.

Ban the bomb.  Save the world for conventional warfare.

Banectomy, n.:
        The removal of bruises on a banana.
                -- Rich Hall, "Sniglets"