Freebsd Fortunes

"... And remember: if you don't like the news, go out and make some of
your own."
                -- "Scoop" Nisker, KFOG radio reporter
                   Preposterous Words

... at least I thought I was dancing, 'til somebody stepped on my hand.
                -- J. B. White

... bleakness ... desolation ... plastic forks ...

... But as records of courts and justice are admissible, it can
easily be proved that powerful and malevolent magicians once existed
and were a scourge to mankind.  The evidence (including confession)
upon which certain women were convicted of witchcraft and executed was
without a flaw; it is still unimpeachable.  The judges' decisions based
on it were sound in logic and in law.  Nothing in any existing court
was ever more thoroughly proved than the charges of witchcraft and
sorcery for which so many suffered death.  If there were no witches,
human testimony and human reason are alike destitute of value.
                -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"

... But if we laugh with derision, we will never understand.  Human
intellectual capacity has not altered for thousands of years so far as
we can tell.  If intelligent people invested intense energy in issues
that now seem foolish to us, then the failure lies in our understanding
of their world, not in their distorted perceptions.  Even the standard
example of ancient nonsense -- the debate about angels on pinheads --
makes sense once you realize that theologians were not discussing
whether five or eighteen would fit, but whether a pin could house a
finite or an infinite number.
                -- S. J. Gould, "Wide Hats and Narrow Minds"

... But we've only fondled the surface of that subject.
                -- Virginia Masters

... [concerning quotation marks] even if we *did* quote anybody in this
business, it probably would be gibberish.
                -- Thom McLeod

 Eat drink and be merry, for tomorrow they may make it illegal.

... Had this been an actual emergency, we would have fled in terror,
and you would not have been informed.

" I changed my headlights the other day. I put in strobe lights
instead! Now when I drive at night, it looks like everyone else is
standing still ..."
                -- Steven Wright