Freebsd Fortunes

"If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do:  Pour a little
Lavoris in the toilet."
                -- Jay Leno

If you eat a live frog in the morning, nothing worse will happen to
either of you for the rest of the day.

"If you ever want to get anywhere in politics, my boy, you're going to
have to get a toehold in the public eye."

If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody
will.

If you give Congress a chance to vote on both sides of an issue, it
will always do it.
                -- Les Aspin, D., Wisconsin

"If you go on with this nuclear arms race, all you are going to do is
make the rubble bounce"
                -- Winston Churchill

If you had any brains, you'd be dangerous.

If you have a procedure with 10 parameters, you probably missed some.

"If you have to hate, hate gently"

If you just try long enough and hard enough, you can always manage to
boot yourself in the posterior.
                -- A. J. Liebling