| Freebsd Fortunes: 310 of 3566 |
According to the obituary notices, a mean and unimportant person never
dies.
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 311 of 3566 |
"According to the Rand McNally Places-Rated Almanac, the best place to
live in America is the city of Pittsburgh. The city of New York came
in twenty-fifth. Here in New York we really don't care too much.
Because we know that we could beat up their city anytime."
-- David Letterman
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 312 of 3566 |
Accordion, n.:
A bagpipe with pleats.
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 313 of 3566 |
Accuracy, n.:
The vice of being right
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 314 of 3566 |
Acid -- better living through chemistry.
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 315 of 3566 |
Acid absorbs 47 times it's weight in excess Reality.
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 316 of 3566 |
Acquaintance, n.:
A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well
enough to lend to.
-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 317 of 3566 |
"Acting is an art which consists of keeping the audience from
coughing."
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 318 of 3566 |
Actor: "I'm a smash hit. Why, yesterday during the last act, I had
everyone glued in their seats!"
Oliver Herford: "Wonderful! Wonderful! Clever of you to think of
it!"
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 319 of 3566 |
Actor: So what do you do for a living?
Doris: I work for a company that makes deceptively shallow serving
dishes for Chinese restaurants.
-- Woody Allen, "Without Feathers"
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