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"According to the Rand McNally Places-Rated Almanac, the best place to
live in America is the city of Pittsburgh. The city of New York came
in twenty-fifth. Here in New York we really don't care too much.
Because we know that we could beat up their city anytime."
-- David Letterman
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A bagpipe with pleats.
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The vice of being right
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Acid -- better living through chemistry.
|Freebsd Fortunes: 315 of 3566|
Acid absorbs 47 times it's weight in excess Reality.
|Freebsd Fortunes: 316 of 3566|
A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well
enough to lend to.
-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
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"Acting is an art which consists of keeping the audience from
|Freebsd Fortunes: 318 of 3566|
Actor: "I'm a smash hit. Why, yesterday during the last act, I had
everyone glued in their seats!"
Oliver Herford: "Wonderful! Wonderful! Clever of you to think of
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Actor: So what do you do for a living?
Doris: I work for a company that makes deceptively shallow serving
dishes for Chinese restaurants.
-- Woody Allen, "Without Feathers"
|Freebsd Fortunes: 320 of 3566|
Actors will happen even in the best-regulated families.