Freebsd Fortunes

"At a recent meeting in Snowmass, Colorado, a participant from Los
Angeles fainted from hyperoxygenation, and we had to hold his head
under the exhaust of a bus until he revived."

At any given moment, an arrow must be either where it is or where it is
not.  But obviously it cannot be where it is not.  And if it is where
it is, that is equivalent to saying that it is at rest.
                -- Zeno's paradox of the moving (still?) arrow

At first, I just did it on weekends.  With a few friends, you know...
We never wanted to hurt anyone.  The girls loved it.  We'd all sit
around the computer and do a little UNIX.  It was just a kick.  At
least that's what we thought.  Then it got worse.

It got so I'd have to do some UNIX during the weekdays.  After a
while, I couldn't even wake up in the morning without having that
crave to go do UNIX.  Then it started affecting my job.  I would just
have to do it during my break.  Maybe a `grep' or two, maybe a little
`more'.  I eventually started doing UNIX just to get through the day.
Of course, it screwed up my mind so much that I couldn't even
function as a normal person.

I'm lucky today, I've overcome my UNIX problem.  It wasn't easy.  If
you're smart, just don't start.  Remember, if any weirdo offers you
some UNIX,

        Just Say No!

At Group L, Stoffel oversees six first-rate programmers, a managerial
challenge roughly comparable to herding cats.
                -- The Washington Post Magazine, June 9, 1985

"At least they're EXPERIENCED incompetents"

At no time is freedom of speech more precious than when a man hits his
thumb with a hammer.
                -- Marshall Lumsden

At the source of every error which is blamed on the computer you will
find at least two human errors, including the error of blaming it on
the computer.

Atlanta makes it against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole
or street lamp.

Atlee is a very modest man.  And with reason.
                -- Winston Churchill

Authors (and perhaps columnists) eventually rise to the top of whatever
depths they were once able to plumb.
                -- Stanley Kaufman